Duality

Author: Aushra Augusta

From Theory of Intertype Relations

The essence of complementation

In many ways human psyche resembles a magnet. It is dual, i.e. it has two individual poles. However, while the poles of a regular magnet are joined together, in the world of higher living beings the other pole – a dual – is another being. We are certain that all animals that create pairs have psyches that complement each other, which means they have at least two types. Except their type is likely determined during the mating period, rather than in their interactions with their parents.

The existence of sixteen types exceptionally complicates the life of a human being, because often one does not manage to find this “second pole.” The individual without a dual to complement them is a restless, spiritually hungry creature that has no idea what it hungers for. The only thing they know is that they are “not understood,” but they do not know what is at fault – themself, their difficult childhood, or society. In this kind of state it is impossible to live at peace with the world. All kinds of conflicts, contradictions, unprovoked aggression get piled up. In search for an answer the individual is reaching to other people and usually gets even more confused in their relationships with them. It is hard to find what you need without favorable conditions and a fitting microenvironment.

Then there is the difference in the intellectual levels. Not everyone can follow the path of J.-J. Rousseau and W. Goethe, who chose to marry women of a lower class in order to provide themselves with the complementary psyche of those women*. They both lived somewhat outside of, or “above”, society, under conditions that allowed them to completely isolate their family lives from the society in which they lived and worked.

* Author’s note: J.-J. Rousseau – IEI, his wife – SLI. W. Goethe – EIE, his wife – LSI.

We often hear that life is easier for the average people than for those who are extraordinary. This appears to make some sense because there is a higher number of the former, which means there are more people in their environment who fit them intellectually while having a complementary, dual psyche.

Asymmetry of the psyche

Human psyche is asymmetric. No one can be simultaneously extraverted and introverted, sensoric and intuitive, logical and ethical, have their inductive and deductive thinking developed equally well. However, even in regular life it is hard to get by without all these qualities.

An extrathyme needs an introthyme, an inductive type needs a deductive type, etc. A relation between the two types where all these properties complement each other we call dual relations, complementary relations, or duality. A human being is a creature that requires a pair not only physiologically, but psychologically as well. Everyone needs a dual who is close to them, be it their father, mother, brother, sister, spouse, colleague. Someone who grew up with a dual parent is more easygoing, has a more balanced nervous system, is better socialized. Others feel somewhat lost, guilty or unneeded, they are lacking in psychological immunity, their aggressiveness (for extrathymes) or conformity (for introthymes) is more prominent. They get into conflicts more often and are drowning in neuroses.

Any human activity has four phases. It necessarily has a tactical aspect (relation with the present – ), a strategic aspect (relation with the future – ), a technical aspect (relation with nature – ), and an ethical aspect (relation with people – ). Each member of a dyad* automatically takes responsibility for two aspects of this program in accordance with the structure of their type of IM. For example, one partner may take responsibility for the tactical and the ethical aspects, the other – for the strategic and the technical aspects. By doing this the duals completely relieve each other from responsibility for those aspects.

* Translator’s note: dyad is another word for a dual pair.

How do people with complementary, dual psyches perceive each other?

As the kind of partner who always knows what needs to be done and when, who understands them, knows how to support and defend them, who is never hurtful and, even more importantly, never takes offence themself. With this kind of partner the individual is stronger and more active. When one lives without their dual, it is as if they always, in any activity, go beyond their own limits and lose balance. The reason this kind of person needs rest is not so much to restore their energy, but rather to restore their mental and physical balance.

The reason for irritability and conflicts, for example at the workplace, can often be found in two people’s initiatives clashing, or in one person not knowing how to pick up and support the other’s initiative. Such conflicts are impossible for duals. They act in sync and activate each other with this synchronicity. One dual picks up another’s initiative just to pass it back when the moment is right. This alternation of activity encompasses all parts of the work being done and increases productivity. Moreover, what one dual does the other perceives as a manifestation of exceptional understanding, skill, valuable and rare abilities.

Not only do duals not want to influence each other destructively, they are unable to do so. They do not have the informational capabilities for that, crossed transactions do not work out. Duals easily come together when they acquire common interests, and when there are no such interests, they separate just as easily and without complications.

A dual partner is better than others because there is no need for compromises. It is as if everything happens on its own. The relationship between duals can be serious and businesslike, it can be playful, but never mean-spirited and aggressive.

Everyone occasionally gets in a bad mood which manifests in grumbling. Duals do not get bothered by that. They never perceive this grumbling as an unpleasant reproach. Often this type of communication is the most direct and transmits extensive information to the partner in the shortest time possible. Often grumbling is just an unconscious request for the other person to explain something one does not understand. No one except the dual can react to this grumbling correctly, i.e. provide the necessary answer or explanation, or sometimes just remain silent.

However, it is worth noting that temporary misunderstandings are possible in a dual marriage. This happens to couples who do not have a good feel for their duality due to growing up in a family without one. They cannot rely on the other person, and in their own family they did not learn to program the dual. Interestingly, if at least one of them knows how to program, the other learns to “receive the program” really quickly. Most people do not know and do not have a feel for what the duality of their psyche is, which is why they do not seek it. Because of this, even during premarital friendship such people tend to look for a great “self-sacrificing” love rather than duality and psychological comfort. Many are sure that true feelings should be accompanied by emotional torment: “There is no love without suffering.”

Duality increases self-respect. Thanks to it the individual is always aware of their place in society. Through being useful to and needed by their dual the individual feels that they are useful to society. Duality provides accurate information about one’s place among other people, which can be used to correct behavior. The more duals are around, the stronger these feelings are.

People relax while reading books written by their dual. Reaction to all other forms of art is the same. Relaxation, peacefulness, a feeling of fullness of life. Helping the dual is simultaneously helping oneself, it is a fulfilment of one’s own needs. What the duals give each other not only does not cost them anything, it is a necessary basis for mental and physical vitality. The partner is truly irreplaceable and precious because they allow you to reach self-realization. However, the relationship of mutual aid does not form between all duals. Real cooperation is needed for it. So it can also be a relationship of complete indifference.

When the duals have such opposite interests that they sabotage each other, they break up, but do not fight: a fight is impossible without crossed transactions. When external circumstances change, they cooperate again as if nothing happened between them.